7.01.2011

Luvox CR [fluvoxamine]

I started fluvoxamine. Luvox CR.

I thought about it pretty intensely. 
I know it could possibly do a lot of good. 
I also know, however, that I am extremely wary of anything that mucks about with my serotonin at this point. I don't honestly know if it needs to be messed with anymore.

Lexapro [escitalopram] made me feel awful.  I suspect Celexa [citalopram] made me manic but I don't really know- I don't remember how I felt at the time, only things that happened-both Cymbalta [duloxetine] and Effexor [venlafaxine] made me a serious mess and genuinely suicidal [one of the only times there have actually been serious questions in my brain regarding my desire to live]. 
Other foolery didn't do much of anything.

But I'm at the point where I need the OCD-wannabe bullshit to just. stop. I don't want to live with it anymore.
I can't. 
I can't manage it.

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